We don’t stop to think about this topic very often, but it’s a very important one. Our words are powerful. They can be used for good or bad, to heal or harm. They impact all our relationships, ourselves, and even what we communicate to strangers. The Holy Bible has lots to say about this, so before going further, let’s look at James 3:3-11 (NLT). It’s a bold statement about the tongue we use to speak our words. Notice it’s as true about us as it was about people living in the first century A.D.
“We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in his mouth. And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.
People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fish, but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison. Sometimes it praises our Lord and Father, and sometimes it curses those who have been made in the image of God. And so blessings and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers and sisters, this is not right! Does a spring of water bubble out with both fresh water and bitter water?”
Jesus Himself adds more to our understanding of this in Luke 6:45 (NIV) when He says this:
“A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. “
In our culture today, there’s very little restraint about words that were once considered in poor taste, offensive, blasphemy, or hateful. Even though this type of speech has been around and used by humans for centuries, we’ve become increasingly desensitized to it – especially young generations who have grown up with it and add to it. That’s what happens when what was taboo for a reason loses its sharp edge and becomes dull through repetition without restraint. A lot of it begins in what’s practiced and tolerated in the home.
New extremes keep coming, normalize, and harden a layer at a time – not all at once. The enemy of our souls, satan, builds them up gradually using stealth to avoid detection so the damage is done before most realize what’s going on. Not just in our world, but in our own hearts. Entertainment, social media, news media, streaming platforms, and certain types of music have made a giant industry of continuously churning out content that pushes the limits. Why? Because there’s a huge audience for it! By our choices, we’re either a part of supporting it or stopping it. I often wonder how the people who sit back and watch or listen to garbage don’t get sick of it to the point they wake up and finally take out the trash! It can ruin lives and relationships, like every other kind of addiction.
Think about this. Remember in the movie Gone With the Wind when Rhett Butler said the word “damn” when he was leaving Scarlet O’Hara? It was the most shocking word in the movie and the talk of the day – added to the script for that purpose (and publicity). That was in 1939. Now, less than 100 years later, can you see how differently we use words?
Let’s get closer to home. Can you remember things said to you many years or decades ago? I can. Some were hurtful, while others were positive and encouraging. As kids and teens, we were especially attuned and vulnerable to what people said to us because we were still figuring out who we were and if we fit in. Kids and teens are the same today. I have a few friends that were so damaged by words their parents said to them, they still filter their self-worth through them as adults.
Likewise, gossip about others that hurts them – and makes you feel better than they are – isn’t something “fun” to do. It’s mean and mean is never ok.
We all need to be more careful instead of careless about the words we use.
Here are some wise words that are timelessly true:
Instead of foul words: “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.” Ephesians 4:29 (NLT)
Instead of angry words: “A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” Proverbs 15:1 (NLT)
Instead of gossip: “A gossip goes around telling secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.” Proverbs 11:13 (NLT)
Instead of “trash talk”: “Wise words are more valuable than much gold and many rubies.” Proverbs 20:15
RESET HIGHER: Do you use different words when talking to different people?
Does your character change from situation to situation, or is it consistent?
If your mouth speaks what your heart is full of, what do you hear?
What words need to go? What can you say instead?
